a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
