Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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