her facebook's as public as her vagina
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
