I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
We just shotgunned beers for America
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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