I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize