We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
