he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
All the doctor said was why
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
