I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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