Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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