3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I have demons in me.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
