Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
