We named our party play list daddy issues
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
