stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize