shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
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