My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
