This is not my ceiling
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
The ass gains better be worth it
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