I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
