Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
