but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
