shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize