check it out our google latitudes are spooning
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize