The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
