He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
