omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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