u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
he thought i was a dude.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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