doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
