Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
