But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
