she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
