I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
