i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize