i don't like sucking hair
My nipple is on Facebook.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
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