Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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