I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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