peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
