That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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