she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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