She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
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