We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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