LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize