I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
