Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
