so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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