think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
