she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
