You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
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