I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
