You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Randomize