apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
