hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize